Six of Wands is actually a Tarot Card. I had never heard of it until I was trying to come up with a title for this post. I feel that it just fits perfectly. There are many versions of how the person and horse are depicted on the card. The one in this picture is a woman holding a victory star and riding a decorated horse that appears to be flying over a heart surrounded by six daisies (a bit of a theme carried over from my first post). The horse represents strength, purity (Katherine actually means purity – no comments from the peanut gallery) and a successful progression of adventure. The Six of Wands represents reaching an important milestone or achievement of a significant goal, and that one has harnessed their strengths to bring about a happy outcome. While the Six of Wands marks an important milestone, one must keep in mind that they are not quite at the finish line just yet. There is still a ways to go and challenges may sit on the path ahead, but to take heart knowing one has the support of those around them.
Demon Drug – Part 2 (with no plans for a trifecta)
I signed off of my last post after infusion #15 and my doctor prescribing a low-dose prednisone with the hope that it would help my near-constant pain and inflammation. After three days of taking it, I started to notice a little bit of pain relief, but then my brain popped out of my head and looked at me with its beady little eyes and asked, “what made you think it was a good idea to give me that damned “Demon Drug” again?” “You know it makes you want to peel your skin off – think how attractive you with no skin on would be, and it sends your anxiety through the roof – it would get very cold very quickly with a hole in said roof, not to mention the fact that there is now no food in the house – you ate everything in site over the past few days”. So I lovingly placed my brain back inside my head and called Dr. H’s office to have them put me on a stepdown program to get off of the steroid. Once you are put on a steroid, there are health ramifications if you just stop taking it without coming off of it over time. After a few days of feeling like total crap as the prednisone wore off, I once again had a happy brain and food in the house.
The journey continues
Thursday, November 14, 2018 – Imfinzi #16 – For the first time since I have had my porta catheter, the oncology nurse had a difficult time accessing it, meaning that she stuck the needle in, but no blood came out into the vial. She said it happens occasionally, but I was a little freaked out by it, mainly because I have been having what feels like muscle pain/spasms in that area off and on for a few months. Anxiety started to rear its ugly head and shout “what ifs” at me. She told me not to worry and that it was probably caused from the change in the weather, which had been quite cold for a day or two. She wet some thick paper towels and warmed them in the microwave and then had me hold them, applying light pressure, over the port (with the needle already in it – ouch!). After about 10 minutes, she flushed the line with Heparin, which they normally do anyway after they take blood and before they administer the Imfinzi (and it leaves a horrible taste in my mouth every time). It worked and she was able to draw the three vials of blood that they take before each infusion to check my white cell counts, liver and kidney functions. The rest of the treatment went as normal. Anxiety slowly crawled back to its corner and went to sleep, always with one eye open.
Thursday, November 29, 2018 – Imfinzi #17 – I met with Dr. H before my infusion and we discussed how I was doing since coming off of the steroid. I told him the swelling and pain is always there and that Aleve continues to be my daily semi-savior, as it never takes all of it away. We also talked about when I am done with the immunotherapy treatment and what happens if the cancer comes back – can I take the drug again or is it a one and done thing. Since this line of treatment is so new, he didn’t really have a concrete answer. We decided together that it just simply won’t come back at all and I won’t have to worry about it. I’m good with that! He listened to my lungs and said they sounded clear and then he asked me how my breathing was. I told him I could definitely tell a difference in how deep a breath I am able to take due to the scar tissue from the radiation. He again said that it could get worse before it gets better. As I was getting up to go into the infusion room, he looked at me and said, “out of all of my patients, you are the only one I can say this to…” (heart beginning to pound a little) a grin appeared on his face as he threw his arms up and excitedly asked, “did you hear that KISS is coming in September?” OMG – totally freaked me out for a minute. As most of my friends and family know, my husband is a huge KISS fan (also plays Peter Criss in a tribute band) and he and Dr. H have bonded over that fact since my second chemo treatment when Brian wore a KISS shirt, which of course sparked the conversation about their shared interest. I just love Dr. H because, not only is he one hell of an oncologist, but he is also just a regular guy!
Thursday, December 13, 2018 – Imfinzi #18 – I have really been monitoring my diet and have actually lost a tiny bit of weight, but somehow the swelling and joint pain got worse. I chatted with the oncology nurse about it and she said it is just the nature of the beast that is chemo/radiation/immunotherapy. She told me to keep up with my diligence, but to not be discouraged as one of the side effects from all of these meds is weight gain. I remain positive and thankful, because it could always be worse.
Thursday, December 27, 2018 – Imfinzi #19 – Even with the Holidays and my son and his wife in town (which means we tend to eat out at all of the places my son misses) I managed to lose a pound, but feeling more achy and tired than ever – I’m thinking Fat and Sassy will just be who I am until this immunotherapy stuff is done and, hopefully, my body begins to recover from the stress of it all.
Thursday, January 10, 2019 – Imfinzi #20 – Met with Dr. H, and discussed the fact that it is taking longer for me to recover after each infusion and my joint pain and swelling are getting worse, as well. We researched some prescription strength anti-inflammatory meds together in his office. After considering it, I decided to just wait it out until after the treatments. I just really don’t want to add any more to my daily cocktail of pills. He scheduled me for a regular chest x-ray in two weeks and then told me I would be having a full-torso CT Scan with contrast sometime in March. I asked him when I would have a PET Scan and he said that, depending on the results of the CT Scan, I may not need one.
Side Note: A couple of months ago I ran across an organization called Lung Force. They are affiliated with the American Lung Association. Part of what they do is gather information from people who have been diagnosed with lung cancer and share it with doctors and researchers to help assist them in finding new treatments and possibly a cure in the not too distant future. Lung Force is pushing the initiative of a preventative measure called, “Saved by the Scan”, a low dose CT Scan used to detect lung cancer, in the same way an annual mammogram, prostate exam or colonoscopy are standard screening tools. I signed up with them and shared my story with their team in the hopes that it will help others, much like my reason for writing this blog. Did you know that every five minutes, a woman in the United States is told she has lung cancer?
Learn * Share * Care at LUNGFORCE.ORG
I only (not using that word lightly) have six more infusions of Imfinzi to go! My final treatment is scheduled for Thursday, April 4, 2019 – exactly one and a half years to the date of when I went to Walgreens clinic for the initial visit that started this rollercoaster ride. I am so looking forward to it!
“Sometimes you have to go through things – not around them.”
“Cancer may have started the fight, but I will finish it!”
As always, love and peace to all and Happy New Year!
Kat
Love and prayers go out to you Kathy. You are one of the strongest people I know. I’m always amazed at your determination and strength after reading your blog.